Gamethread: White Sox at Mariners

IS THIS YOUR KING?!?! Its an age old battle of the New Guard taking on the Old Dying Kingdom as Dylan Cease takes on the “Bad King” Felix Hernandez. (Credit: CColePhotography)


We’ve got another late night in front of us fellow Midwesterners, but if last night’s (and this morning’s) effort from the White Sox offense is any indication, there might be enough fireworks to justify another Red-Bull fueled live-watch as the Sox go for two in a row against the Emerald City Mariners.

Thanks to the barnacle that is Dylan Covey’s death rattle of a start, it took four (!) of the teams more reliable bullpen arms to bleed a five-run lead down to a one-run sliver of a cushion. Thank goodness the Red-handed Bandit (Hey Wilzy! Got another shirt idea for ya!) came in to add some much needed space for Colome in the 9th:

It appears a wayward 12 year old Mariners fan is now in Left Field…

Tonight, Dylan Cease (#84, 23, RHP, 3-7, 6.53) hopes to get some of that sweet run support that he so very much needs as he faces the Mariners for the first time in his career (here’s hoping we repeat that sentence for as many years as it takes to get to the other 29!). Our Ace-in-Training has sandwiched a meaty and savory 11-K performance in Cleveland between the moldy, green-speckled bread of two not so delicious outings against the Twins and Angels. Let’s hope he can find a way past his first-inning woes as he’s facing a Seattle team that is 2-8 in their last 10 games, so if there was any time for Dylan to get a chance to take it to the West Coast version of the 2016 White Sox, tonight could be a very special night!

His opponent is…. woof… apparently it is the hulled-out husk that once was the most dominant pitcher in the Pacific Northwest, Felix Hernandez (#34, 33, RHP, 1-6, 6.96). Let’s check on how he fared against the Astros… Um.. er…

“Step, kick, step, step, kick…” Felix practicing for his next career in A Chorus Line

Yikes… the Bad King has been practically unwatchable for the past 2 seasons, and 2019 hasn’t been much better. His last two starts lasted a combined five innings, including a line against Houston that is rather Covey-esque (2 IP, 7 H, 11 R, 7 ER, 2 BB, 1 K). Now no one will confuse the Sox offense as a comparable one to the Astros…. but we took the season series against those chumps so I guess Felix will give up 20 to the Sox tonight… (Fingers crossed!)

I would be remiss if I didn’t also mention that prior to the game tonight, the Mariners will be honoring perhaps one of the greatest foreign-born MLB player in the modern era (or even any era really), Ichiro Suzuki. The one and true hit king officially retired after the Mariners first two games of the 2019 season were played in Japan back in Spring Training. As proof of his Baseball Sainthood, here’s a clip of him doing something that would lead to a broken face to 99.7% of the rest of Earth’s population:

Lineups! Get your Lineups!

The Mariners were so considerate, they gave me this lovely tweet that saves me the trouble of posting two separate lineups. I should send y’all a Hi Mom shirt…

Game time is 8:10 PM CST (oh boy! A whole hour sooner than yesterday!) and with Jason Benetti off doing one of his 36 other gigs for other four-lettered networks, the completely capable and easy to listen to Andy Masur will step into the booth again, this time on NBC Sports Chicago. As always, WGN 720 AM is your spot for your radio listening pleasure. I have a special treat for the recap, so all I’ll say about that is: “Go ahead caller, I’m listening.”

Seriously, drink a Red Bull or two… it’ll be worth it.

Hi Mom!! has arrived

Leave it to South Side Hit Pen to create the coolest Chicago White Sox shirt of the season.

Our Hi Mom!! is out now at our TeePublic store, at a super-friendly price that directly supports your favorite White Sox site.

And we ain’t just about T-shirts, people. We got stuff, bigtime.

NOTEBOOKS!
PILLOWS!
HOODIES!
SLEEVELESS RACERBACK!

Seriously, there’s no reason you shouldn’t just place a standing monthly order with our TeePublic.

One happy customer, SSHP Chicago Dogs insider and Tim Anderson best bud Leonard Gore, already has his first merch from TeePublic, and it’s looking good:

LG, rocking the site logo threads.

Hi Mom!! is the first of what promises to be several collaborations between SSHP Maestro of Merch Lauren Wilner and SickSticks design studio.

Hi Mom!! and all of our other store merch (also accessible via the tab at the very top of our site) is on flash sale for the rest of Friday, and 16×20 wall art is also on sale for $20. But the regular prices are plenty sweet, and we’re adding new items rapidly.

Let us know what you think, and we’re always open to cool new merchandise ideas (email Laurensshp@gmail.com)! Thanks in advance for all your support in our first month, capped by Lauren’s fab storefront initiative. We know you’re gonna love it!